i am no longer writing this out of sheer impulse or anger or anything ner that spectrum, i am not saying that i have dealt with so much elucidation either.
i am writing this simply beacuse i've had enough of this. by "this" i mean the current state i am in - this state of making sense of the non-sense or accepting what i feel as totally unacceptable.
it is hard when all fingers point down to you. ji am not claiming to be somebody pristine or somebody who is faultless. i admit my mistakes and hold myslef accountable for its consequences. however, i am also a person who has not failed to deliver or even exceed what was asked of me. i know where i stand and i feel not be fooled by the attempts to put me dwn or to attack me.
i know that i am expected to things are even beyond what i perceive to be part of what i am paid of. i do them without hesitation, with full acceptance and even end up brainwashing my own mind just make it appeal to my standards.
however, no matter how much i try to matter how much i make sense of this situation and make myself understand that it is all for the sake of being vissible and it got so much to do with performance, i'd like to think that meeting expectations goes above nad beyond visibility.
mamanging the performance of my uinit goes above and beyond merely being vissible. and admit it, not all pople who make themselves vissible to everyone does what they're supposed to do. why don't we measure people on the results that they have provided? why dont we take from what they've done and really understand how one affects performance?
sometimes, in our desperation to maintain the status quo, we arrive at solutions that may prove to be catchy but may not be addressing what we strive to target.
again, i am just thinking aloud. voiceless as i may seem in this very loud and punishing corporate/capitalistic sphere.
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