I live like there is no tomorrow, love as if I do not know heartache, dream as if i have not known failure, embraced the world as if it embraced me back, and I write as if I will die without words.
I am Ayien.

Sunday, September 16, 2007

-tough-

as i have learned, my happiness comes with a very high price. and right now, i am just not sure if i am ready to take that risk.

i know that i am unfair and totally selfish to the point of hedonism. i am still in that limbo where i found myself in a few weeks back. it's tough for me to pull myself out of it like the way i have pulled myself out from similar situations in the past. right now i feel happy - i am in that state where nothing else matters but NOW. i know that i would have to pay a high price any time soon and i do not know if i can endure it. but right now i am drowning myself with this heady state for as long as it last, and if after this, they'd ask for my head, i have no other choice but to oblige, it is after all the path i have chosen to tread.

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